#Mamablues
Hey mamas… :)
Did you recently just deliver a baby, feeling stressed, and blues, especially new moms?
This is a blog message for all of you. Would like to share some thoughts, to help myself and others to walk out of those blues.
Would like to inform you that I’m definitely not professional. But would like to share some experiences.
Just a mini background:
My husband and I always wanted children. We were newly married 2 years ago and had been trying very hard to conceive. For the past 2 years, I had 2 miscarriages before I had a rainbow baby. :)
We both always thought that we were ready to welcome a new life, an addition of having a mini little us to our family. We thought we were all ready physically, buying cots, clothes, and necessities.
During the entire pregnancy, we practice to be a good parent to our future child. Trying to lay out expectations of each other, of newborns. We read up a lot on how to manage pregnancy and children. I believe you know the very famous book: ‘What to Expect When You Are Expecting’. We even read till 1 year old so that we can expect what is coming up.
Here comes Post Partum:
After delivering our first child, a baby girl. The first 2 days were filled with joy. The next few days here comes the hellish part (All hell broke loose). Both of us heard grunts, sleepless nights, multiple difficult latching, feeding, third-fourth day engorgement, wrong pump flange size, jaundice, dip in milk supply, and no breast milk. A lot of things that shouldn’t and you would never think could go wrong, went all wrong.
As parents, we all want to provide the best for our children. When her first Jaundice hit she needed to go to the emergency. The sleepless us lashed out at each other. Our expectations for each other were different but all for our child.
But Hey Mamas….
The thing I want to let you know is. Regardless of everything, all the mess. You need to hear this. No one is as precious as you. If you’re stressed, not sleeping well, blue, how much strength will you have to take care of the baby? Give yourself a pat. Tell yourself it’s really okay. Not enough breastmilk there are formulas out there. Anyway, baby, when they grow up they don’t even remember if you breastfed them or not.
Not enough sleep, sleep as soon as baby sleeps.
Not enough energy to do the laundry, just fuck it.
Give yourself some time, and a little break, everything will be okay. Most importantly you do a little bonding and skin-ships with your baby. Let them feel secure and safe when you’re around. Take it day by day….
To all the Dads out there. The most important job for you is to be a tag team. Throw the dirty laundry, and change the diapers. Plan out a sleeping schedule. Give some hugs, some massage for your ladies.
If things didn’t go both of your ways.
It’s really really okay. You both will have a lot of worries for the future. A lot of anxiety for now. A lot of what-ifs and a lot of Hows. Let loose and experience it fully and firsthand. If needed help search for it.
After all. Children, only remember new skills, playtime, and what they played. Who they play, and spend time the most with.
So relax! We will all not be perfect anyway. So just go through it and your baby needs you. ☺️
To me: to the baby blues I had, Please relax anxious mom.
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